Ah, the joys of writing gay sex when you don't have the requisite equipment. I feel your pain. I've taken examples from other fics, as well as done research, although some of the more common things in fics, like spit for lube or completely unprepared anal sex, are issues one wants to avoid. Now that I know about the basics, it bugs me to see liberties taken, but fandom is all about fantasy, like you said, so I live and let live.
Your description of your first fanfic is hilarious. I want to see the fill for that prompt now... To me, being a newbie at something means a lot of things, but mostly that you're ignorant: in fanfic, it means ignorant of the basic structures, of the comm rules, and of your own inclinations and limitations.
Random example: When I first started crocheting my second or third project was a cardigan. It turned out awfully. However, my fifth and sixth were doilies, which everyone is scared of, but I wasn't, because a) still a newbie and b) my grandma did them all the time. So now I have a really impressive skill, just because I didn't know I "should" be scared of trying. To this day, I'm much less afraid of trying new stuff, because my early experiences proved common knowledge wrong.
There's no real point in that story...except maybe that this is not life and death. There are no fanfic gods out there that will come down on you with wrathful flames if you mess up (and any human idiot that does is just being rude). Like you said, someone may point out you're writing something really hard or impossible for a real person to do, but that's what research and betas are for. I think the best thing to do, if it's at all possible, is divorce your emotions from your relative mastery of a subject. If there's a mistake, then you find out what it is, and fix it, easy-peasy. Feeling embarrassed and ashamed just wastes your time and distracts you from the important thing: the story.
And because it is apparently give my opinion day, I'll give you my thoughts on writing sex:
Writing good sex is a dance, and a matter of focus. How the characters are positioned is simply a matter of imagination and physicality, easily researched, as well as what the characters are ready for. What preparatory steps you mention depends on the relationship between the characters (first time, established relationship, how much experience both partners have), what is important to them, and what's important to you as an author (personally, I'm rather squicked by the thought of STDs, so I will mention condoms if it's in character to do so).
Then there's what "feel" do you want the story to have: gritty and real versus dreamy fantasy (and all the variants in between)? If you're aiming for reality, then congrats! All that research just paid off. You get to mention all the details, from physical and emotional changes and reactions, to the sights and sounds and smells that happen during intimate acts. Dreamy fantasy stuff, however, is, to me, rooted inside the mind. It's how the acts feel, physically and, most importantly, emotionally, that comes to the forefront. The details might be there, but they'll probably be smudged, seen through a lust-fogged viewpoint.
There is also the reason you're writing the scene. Is it a pwp for the kink meme? Then you're obviously going to focus on the physical acts that were requested, as well as the arousal of the characters. Is it part of a larger fic? Then what do you want the sex to accomplish? Does it build the relationship stronger or reveal it's weaknesses? Or is it just a hot interlude before you get back to the plot?
That's all I've got to say, I guess. Honestly, I do still find sex a challenge to write. Although I've done a few scenes, some fairly graphic, I feel I've still got quite a ways to travel before I'm an accomplished porn writer. It's nice to have a fellow writer out there to share thoughts with.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2012-04-10 07:02 pm (UTC)Your description of your first fanfic is hilarious. I want to see the fill for that prompt now... To me, being a newbie at something means a lot of things, but mostly that you're ignorant: in fanfic, it means ignorant of the basic structures, of the comm rules, and of your own inclinations and limitations.
Random example: When I first started crocheting my second or third project was a cardigan. It turned out awfully. However, my fifth and sixth were doilies, which everyone is scared of, but I wasn't, because a) still a newbie and b) my grandma did them all the time. So now I have a really impressive skill, just because I didn't know I "should" be scared of trying. To this day, I'm much less afraid of trying new stuff, because my early experiences proved common knowledge wrong.
There's no real point in that story...except maybe that this is not life and death. There are no fanfic gods out there that will come down on you with wrathful flames if you mess up (and any human idiot that does is just being rude). Like you said, someone may point out you're writing something really hard or impossible for a real person to do, but that's what research and betas are for. I think the best thing to do, if it's at all possible, is divorce your emotions from your relative mastery of a subject. If there's a mistake, then you find out what it is, and fix it, easy-peasy. Feeling embarrassed and ashamed just wastes your time and distracts you from the important thing: the story.
And because it is apparently give my opinion day, I'll give you my thoughts on writing sex:
Writing good sex is a dance, and a matter of focus. How the characters are positioned is simply a matter of imagination and physicality, easily researched, as well as what the characters are ready for. What preparatory steps you mention depends on the relationship between the characters (first time, established relationship, how much experience both partners have), what is important to them, and what's important to you as an author (personally, I'm rather squicked by the thought of STDs, so I will mention condoms if it's in character to do so).
Then there's what "feel" do you want the story to have: gritty and real versus dreamy fantasy (and all the variants in between)? If you're aiming for reality, then congrats! All that research just paid off. You get to mention all the details, from physical and emotional changes and reactions, to the sights and sounds and smells that happen during intimate acts. Dreamy fantasy stuff, however, is, to me, rooted inside the mind. It's how the acts feel, physically and, most importantly, emotionally, that comes to the forefront. The details might be there, but they'll probably be smudged, seen through a lust-fogged viewpoint.
There is also the reason you're writing the scene. Is it a pwp for the kink meme? Then you're obviously going to focus on the physical acts that were requested, as well as the arousal of the characters. Is it part of a larger fic? Then what do you want the sex to accomplish? Does it build the relationship stronger or reveal it's weaknesses? Or is it just a hot interlude before you get back to the plot?
That's all I've got to say, I guess. Honestly, I do still find sex a challenge to write. Although I've done a few scenes, some fairly graphic, I feel I've still got quite a ways to travel before I'm an accomplished porn writer. It's nice to have a fellow writer out there to share thoughts with.
Wishing us both luck!
Percy