All things go down better with pie...

[mugenmine]

So I printed out the story. It was 42 pages in 11 pt Courier and double spaced. It had weight to it, and it really just made me happy holding it in my hands. The fact that two stories have come out of me is a very big deal for me. Some people can just produce and I haven't produced work on this cadence for far far too long, so these two stories, although it's only about 15,000 words in total kind of mean the world to me. 

I then went North, literally. I put the story in my bag and then walked 2 hours due North, to clear my head and enjoy the spring day and find a place where I could sit down and assess the damage.  I think a first draft is like returning home after a magnitude 7 earth quake.  The basic structure of  your home is still there, but the walls are crumbling and maybe your TV set is broken and your bed is in your kitchen. So you go in and look around and think,okay it's still my home, but how the fuck am I going to put this back together, and do I have any insurance...

So I went North, tried on some skirts on the way and then passed a pie shop, walked 25 more blocks then decided I wanted pie, so I backtracked and found a place to sit.  I thought what goes good with dub-con and angst?  It seems caramel, chocolate pecan pie does... with a latte... Then I listened to Deadweight on Velveteen 47 times and read my story. And then I wanted to cry a little, because it didn't suck as much as I had anticipated and I was happy for that. Then two old people came in and wanted my table, so I gave it to them... I mean you can't refuse your table to a sweet old man with tennis balls on his walker... He was a sweet guy...

The order of the story holds and I'm happy with the progression. I think I get John from point A to point B but there's this really hasty part where I need to tone back his acceptance of things because it's not realistic.... *add some doubt back in there John Watson!*  There are of course, many awkward transitions, wrong words, hasty actions, voice inconsistencies and the whole thing needs about 100 more readings, backwards forwards, out-loud, upside down and many many sessions under the red pen. I think the fear when reading the completed first draft is saying, holy shit I must've been on crack for the past two weeks because this shit is fundamentally flawed and thankfully I didn't get that feeling.  So I know I can work with this...  I am hopeful.

Comments

[fantomeq.livejournal.com]

The chapter I read on AO3 was lovely and well-polished. Don't stress too much. :) Looking forward to when you post the next bit.

[mugenmine.livejournal.com]

Heya!

Thank you so much! Mind you I did edit that story about 100 times! (not exaggerating, really) :-) LOL.

Yes, I hope to get it up early to mid-april :-) That will give me enough time to do the fit and finish :-)

xxoxoxx

mm